We started the school year last week. I'm more encouraged now than I was a few weeks ago when I was feeling like a failure of a homeschooling mother. We're down to a bare-bones curriculum - faith, reading, writing and arithmetic during the day, and my husband does history with the girls in the evening. It's pretty dry right now as I'm working with the girls when the baby naps or when we're in the car, but just getting the basics done is encouraging enough for now. I am not a very good homeschooling mother. The Lord gave me gifts and natural inclinations in other areas - mostly related to making things prettier (you could say I'm good in superficial matters?). Don't get me wrong, the daytime hours around here are wonderful. I think my children have a very pleasant childhood. But the wonderful is generally experienced outside the schooling framework. I think that is a shame, but I don't seem to be able to do well what other mothers accomplish with their children's education. Let me be clear - it isn't about comparing. I'm beyond that at this stage in my life. The wonder and beauty of another's homeschooling atmosphere is nothing short of pure inspiration to me.
It can be a challenge, sometimes, to accept that we are not good at everything. Even more so when our shortcomings affect our children. But embracing our natural gifts while still working to improve in areas difficult for us is extremely freeing, as I'm learning. It frees us to be able to do well what God wants for us, not what we think we should be good at. It really isn't about us anyway. Our gifts aren't really ours. Anything good we do is from above.
12 comments:
Very well stated!
I'm inspired by others but am quite grounded in what I can accomplish in a day. And what I'm good at.
For instance, I would love to sew as my SIL and friend do. Such pretty things come out of their machines. Mine, well there is practice and work to do before my dresses look as sweet as theirs. Until then I adore to look at theirs and get a good chuckle at what comes out of mine.
God has been so good to me in other ways and that serves me just fine. I think you create beautiful memories for your family. God bless you abundantly!
I was never good at homeschooling. And sadly, I am not good at making things pretty!! I don't think it's superficial, I think it's a gift! Remember, God and our faith are all about truth, goodness and beauty. How I envy those women like you who can create beauty for their families!!!
You are very busy right now so be kind to yourself. A new baby changes the dynamics so much. Last year, after Matthew's death, when school started in my home, it was God's saving grace that got me out of my room. God will give you the grace to make your homeschool day what you want it to be soon. I can't imagine your day being "dry" but I know what you mean. Right now you are giving your children what is important, a loving home with loving parents open to what God has gifted you with.
About the only thing I can make is a smocked dress, but I am so very slow. At times I wish to sneak away just to create things with my needle, but for now, I'll go at God's pace. God Bless you Kristen.
I feel like virtue development and life skills cannot be wasted. You will always have time to learn history or math, but those life skills learned at a young age (ie. taking care of little brother, being kind to sister, helping mommy with chores) will last forever.
You are doing a great job, Kristen!
Wonderfully inspired post. Thank you for sharing.
I have a friend my age who was homeschooled with her two younger sisters. She says she doesn't remember doing much (although she knows they did do some workbooks and such) more than reading. Reading lots of books. Her mother allowed them lots of time to read. To this day she is a voracious reader. She's also finished high school, college, and graduate school and is a missionary in Indonesia who has had the desire, patience and ability to learn the language needed to speak to the people that she ministers to. I'd say she's a well-educated adult and it started with a "good enough" home education.
All that is to say that I appreciate your honesty as well. We are planning on homeschooling. However, I'm very relaxed about it. And I know that I won't be the kind that has elaborately planned lessons all the time. I want to leave lots of room for kids to learn other interests and lots of time for reading!
Have you see this: http://amongstlovelythings.blogspot.com/2010/07/truths-about-mom.html
Kristin, You love your children immensely and they know that and so you take the time to give them many beautiful experiences from which they will learn many important things, things they might not learn if they spent all day with their heads in a workbook. I'm not saying that workbook learning is wrong or bad - there is definitely a place for them! But I have to agree that, especially in the lower grades, reading (or being read to) a lot as well as opportunities to explore and experience will go a lot farther to instilling a LOVE for learning than workbooks will.
If I could change one thing about homeschooling my older children it would be to go back and be a lot less structured; to show them that learning is meant to be enjoyable and not something to dread, to love to seek things out. They've learned it over time as they've gotten older, but not as much as my younger ones whom I am starting different.
My oldest daughter is off to college this fall, and I attribute her great ACT scores to the fact that she READ voraciously, not because I did everything right (hardly!).
Let the Lord guide you in all you do and you will see the fruit of that as your children grow.
God Bless.
I read your post yesterday and wanted to pray on my response. The seasons of our life are the lesson, yours this year being the new baby. It is not the curriculum we use, the amount of time we spend planning lessons that matter it is the time we spend doing with the children that is important, being with them, showing them, helping them. It sounds to me like you are indeed very gifted in that area too. : )
I personally and purposefully adhere to a bare-boned curriculum for my now 2nd grader and almost kindergartener...basically the 4 Rs.
You said: "But the wonderful is generally experienced outside the schooling framework."
This is just my opinion, but I suspect children at these ages do best and positively blossom through play and natural child-led exploration rather than with a rigorous homeschooling and extracurricular structure. My children learn best (and by that I mean, really embrace and love obtaining knowledge) when they make discoveries all on their own through play and exploration. Some of our best "homeschooling" takes place on a nature walk, hand-in-hand, where they ask good honest questions about the world around them. Or during a family game of Yahtzee or Sorry where they really see math in action rather than on a worksheet.
I'm not a die-in-the-wool unschooler, but I homeschool with an unschooling heart...trying to be more of a learning "facilitator" than a teacher.
Anyways...all this is just really to say...don't sell yourself short! You are doing what you can with what you have right now and your children are still learning all the time!
I know I am not a good homeschooling mom either. I want to go on fieldtrips all day long :) That's why our Catholic elementary school is perfect for this mom!
I think bare bones is a really good choice for this year with the new babies- personally, I drool over classical programs of learning- but I know that it wouldn't be right for us- we are busy learning my husband's language and Spanish (my kids are older than yours)- there 's no time for Latin and Greek- so we are not 'in' with a majority of our fellow Catholic homeschoolers- oh well- as you said- "Eyes on your own work- people!"
Thank you, everyone. Very much.
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